


happy

by lilac_heart (destinedtobelokid)



Series: one word prompts [2]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-13
Updated: 2013-04-13
Packaged: 2017-12-08 10:10:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 628
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/760174
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/destinedtobelokid/pseuds/lilac_heart
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It’s only after four months of marriage that she notices it; the distant look in Arthur’s eyes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	happy

It’s only after four months of marriage that she notices it; the distant look in Arthur’s eyes.

Gwen bites her lip and lowers her head, staring at her hands, twisting them- twisting her wedding ring- around and around as she blinks back tears. It hurts her to see Arthur like this. It hurts even more to know that she is the cause of his silence, his sadness.

He’s hasn’t said anything, no. He’s far too noble and far too much of an idiot to say a word but Gwen isn’t a fool. She knows, or more, she recognises it; she recognises the look in Arthur’s eyes, the soft yet pained look of longing as he stares off to the side, his eyes following the slim figure as he moves around the banquet hall.

Her heart clenches. Not in anger, or jealousy, but in grief; there once was a time when kind, dark eyes hand sent the same looks in her direction.

She sniffs quietly and takes a breath. Arthur's hand is resting on the table, curled into a fist.

“Arthur?” She rests a hand over her king’s, fingers smoothing over his warm skin.

He turns to her, but he doesn’t meet her eyes. Arthur stares over her shoulder, close to her right ear.

“Are you alright, sire?”

He only nods, eyes dark and… sad.

Gwen forces herself to smile. “I was thinking about retiring to my chambers for the evening.”

Arthur moves his chair back and starts to stand, but Gwen places her hand on his shoulder. “No, sire. Please, don’t get up for me.

She kisses his cheek, and wishes him a soft “Goodnight, Arthur.”

Arthur smiles, and it’s the affectionate, lovely smile he always gives to her. There once was a time when that smile would send flutters in her stomach; the knowledge that she was the only one to see this smile had once made her warm, but now she wishes that once, just once, Arthur would smile at her like he smiles at Merlin; small and private, soft and loving, bright and proud, lewd and teasing.

Gwen smooths her skirts as she leaves the hall with her head held high, nodding and smiling to the guests that bow or curtsey to their queen.

Gwen walks until the noises of the hall fades to a soft murmur and she finds herself standing on the balcony, staring out into the night. There’s a cold breeze, but it’s welcome; a gentle whisper over her flushed skin cools the sweat from her brow and the red in her cheeks. The banquet hall had grown far to hot for Gwen’s comfort. She sighs and closes her eyes, tilting her head back to cool her neck.

“Oh Lancelot,” Gwen whispers to the night. “If you could see these two fools…”

The stars give a twinkle, and she can almost see Lancelot smiling down at her, she can almost hear the low chuckle, and the crinkles around his eyes, the laugh-lines. She smiles back.

“They’re so noble. Too noble. Just like you were.”

The past tense stings, and a mist settles over Gwen’s eyes but she doesn’t shed a tear.

“Arthur’s not himself any more… He’s quiet, reserved, careful. Merlin doesn’t smile as much, he can barely look at me.”

Gwen sighs. She stares at the golden band on her finger. It shimmers and shines in the moonlight. She twists it around again.

“I’ve hurt them. I tore them apart. I don’t want to hurt them. I never meant to... I want them to be happy, Lancelot."

There's no reply, but Gwen doesn't expect one. She turns, heading back into the castle, slowly making her way to her own personal chambers.

 _Tomorrow,_ Gwen tells herself. _Tomorrow, I'll talk to them both._


End file.
